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[chaos_drifter]

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[major_rawne]

It makes a hell of a difference to him. I think you scared him, even if he didn't get hurt.

Also, please give me the knife.

[chaos_drifter]

I never brought it back to the Barge. I am currently in my cabin.

[A pause, and then,] He seemed more angry than afraid.

[major_rawne]

Ok, good. I thought you'd stabbed him here.

Fear and anger can look the same, from the outside. And it's easier to be angry than afraid.

[Easier for him, at least.]

[chaos_drifter]

[The outside is all they can see at the moment.]

Why do you think that?

[major_rawne]

When I first arrived here, I was angry, all the time. It was easier than admitting that I was terrified and grieving.

[chaos_drifter]

[That makes no more sense to them.] I thought humans could only choose how they react to their emotions, not which emotions they feel.

[major_rawne]

It depends on the human. In my case, I was feeling both anger and grief, I just suppressed the grief and ignored it in favor of the anger.

[chaos_drifter]

What did you do about that anger?

[major_rawne]

I let it consume me, until my warden showed me how to let it go.

[chaos_drifter]

Interesting. [They are consumed by emptiness.] Did you hurt anyone?

[major_rawne]

Yes. I hurt a lot of people.

[chaos_drifter]

Does hurting someone ever feel good? [Should it?]

[major_rawne]

I felt good when I hurt people. It wasn't.. I don't know, sustainable? though. Just a brief surge of adrenaline. There's other, better ways to feel good.

[chaos_drifter]

[Another physical experience, then. They understand the rush that people describe, from experiencing it secondhand, but have never felt it themself.]

Such as?

[major_rawne]

Drinking, sex, eating with friends. Fucking around in the Enclosure. Finishing a difficult job.

[chaos_drifter]

[Sex was a new physical experience for them.] I may try some of those.

[major_rawne]

Feel free to. Word of advice, if you drink too much, you'll have a terrible hangover after.

Sorry! I thought I’d responded to this!

[chaos_drifter]

Does it taste good? [They have no idea how their body works in that respect, but they want to find out.]

That's all right, I've been busy!

[major_rawne]

Alcohol? If it's the good stuff, yes. The lounge here has a good selection.